Blowing out his breath, he tried all over again before one of the residents exited. Quickly he reached for the door and held it open so he could get inside. Warmth overwhelmed his body at first and he welcomed it. With the wind chill it was cold enough to cause amnesia. Taking the stairs rather than the elevator, he raced up to her floor, and stopped just shy of pounding on her door. A sudden nervousness slithered up his spine. Without giving in to what eluded him before, he raised his hand and knocked on the door. On the other side, he heard feet pattering and a bump against the door. Knowing she would look through the peephole first, he covered his hand over the glass so she couldn’t see who was at the door. When she didn’t answer, he called out through their thick barrier. “I heard you walking to the door, Hadley. Open up.” For a moment the air was still and he couldn’t hear so much as a creak from the floorboards until the lock unlatched and the door began to open. Through the. And scared to death."I can't do that Amanda. I mean, a girl's first time should be an amazing experience. It should be special. I know most girls don't get that. But I can't be your first," I said."Why?" Amanda said.I didn't have a chance to respond."Yeah. Why?" Jessica responded.I was blown away. They were looking at me, really expecting an answer and I didn't have one.Lying there, I realized, much to my shock, I wanted to do this. I really wanted to do this. I looked at Jessica, glanced at Amanda and I didn't say anything for a second.Amanda stared at me, and finally said, "I get it. I understand." She started to climb up off the bed.I reached over and, gently, grabbed her arm, pulling her back to me.I looked at Amanda and said, "I just don't want something really bad to come out of this. The consequences could be ugly. If the wrong person finds out. If something gets said. If someone suspects."Amanda just laughed.I stared at her. Jessica stared at her."What's so funny?" I.
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